Blog Again, Blog Again, Jiggity Jig
I want to make you think, to help you enjoy life, to encourage you to appreciate friends, and to laugh.
How to begin? How does one go about reanimating that which has been thrown asunder into oblivion? There are laws against abandoning children and pets which carry heavy penalties. Those who leave leftovers unattended are destined to suffer strange odors and unidentified life forms populating the refrigerator. Unfortunately for silent blogs worldwide, there is no retribution, no salvation, no champion. When they fall into disrepair and neglect they suffer quietly, fading into utter darkness alone. Such has been the fate of this poor little blog.
If it were a houseplant, it would have long ago withered into a dry husk of death. If it were a landscape, it surely would be overrun by weeds and all manner of detestable pests. If it were a child in a third world country, I could perhaps offer to sell it and its parentage rights to a famous benevolent movie star. If it were the national debt… well, you get the picture.
I determined from the beginning of this adventure that I would continue to blog until I was no longer able, or until it simply wasn’t fun anymore. I have to admit, I have bored myself at times (I hope you can’t say the same). I would hate to think that my blog would lose relevance as entertainment before I stopped, and I kept writing pedantically, fooling myself into believing that it actually had some value, when even my closest friends would rather bathe in Worcestershire sauce and dance around with miniature poodles in orange berets than have to endure another single sentence of my putrid pen. No, the reason for my blog’s currently decrepit timeline is directly related to the number of seconds in a minute, minutes in an hour, hours in a day, days in a week. I didn’t have enough… enough seconds that is. I have had a distinct lack of time in which to perform my blogging duties.
No longer! It is time to turn over a new leaf! Under said leaf we hope to find coffee beans. Otherwise, the whole leaf-turning thing would be irrelevant, now wouldn’t it?
I hope to entertain you with many more posts in the future. I want to make you think, to help you enjoy life, to encourage you to appreciate friends, and to laugh. Laugh long, hard, and boisterously, or with grimace, a silent chuckle, a snorted guffaw, or when in desperate measures, a sarcastic rolling of the eyes. Laugh with me or at me. I’m good with either. Just laugh…
And while you’re at it, think to yourself whether you would actually take the advice of a tanker truck driving down the highway, proclaiming to know the secret to life and good coffee. I had to wonder whether the truck actually contained said coffee, or whether it was false advertising. And if indeed one wanted to partake of its promised coffee goodness, would the truck stop for you, or would you have to balance on top at 70 miles an hour, carefully balancing, siphoning, and watching for low bridges all at the same time? These questions being too much for my road-weary mind at the time, I let the opportunity pass.
