Say No To Boring Coffee
I love the experience, and the chance to write, but I can’t honestly say that I love coffee.
As I continue my journey towards coffee snobbery, I find myself at odds with many. No longer can I count myself among the staunch coffee haters, because coffee haters would never stoop to this quest upon which I have embarked. Neither can I call myself a coffee lover. I love the experience, and the chance to write, but I can’t honestly say that I love coffee. In fact, the other day I was traveling around the great and glorious state of Colorado, taking pictures, shopping, trying new things, and touring coffee shops. As I sat before the very last cup of coffee for the day, trying in vain to tease out tangible flavors lying just beyond my perception, I came to a realization. I was sick and tired of coffee – drinking coffee, describing coffee, finding coffee, thinking about coffee.
I came across an article a few days later on Yahoo Shine entitled, “10 Worst Food Trends,” by Jonathan Gold of Sunset Magazine. Jonathan seems to carry much acclaim, having won a Pulizter Prize for Criticism. I’ve won no awards for my writing, except perhaps recognition from my third grade teacher. Therefore, I believe that many of his opinions are well-founded, and indeed I have found many of them to be true in my own personal experience. The item I take offense with is number nine of ten. Jonathan makes the following statement:
“Third-wave coffee: Do we applaud fair-trade, sustainable farmed, shade-grown joe? Sure. Why not? But when we sit down to a cup of coffee in the morning, we are not particularly interested in the blueberry, caramel, or tomato soup nuances a dedicated roaster can coax out of a bean, not in the intricate ballet of the four-minute pour-over or the Eva Solo flagon. We want coffee that tastes like coffee, and we want it now.”
I could not disagree more. It is difficult enough for me to try to enjoy coffee, without having to chug it like an imbecile. If I’m going to enjoy it, it has to have more going for it than just being coffee. I would most certainly want to know if the coffee I was about to slurp had an essence of tomato soup – it might taint my opinion, but you had better be sure I would be upset if I wasn’t warned. Furthermore, Mr. Gold’s supposititious remarks are denegrading to both the roasting artist and the pursuant of good coffee artistry. I don’t yet know what an Eva Solo flagon is, but I do hope to find out. I intend to make full use of all resources available to discover what it is that has infatuated so many coffee connoisseurs. The coffee that simply tastes like coffee has a flavor that I call something-foully-odorus-hung-from-a-polluted-urban-rat-infested-high-rise-windowsill. If that’s what you want, brew your own or find a cheap substitute. I refuse to contaminate my sense of taste for the pleasure of your apathy.
Now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, lets go get some coffee!I’ve got a blog to write! Opinions to form!A World to plague with inane coffee-related questions!The journey has only just begun!
ORIGINAL COMMENTS
Nathan S., July 8, 2011 at 3:20 PM
I certainly disagree with his number nine statement as well. In fact, most people that enjoy good coffee would rather not drink a cup in the morning than drink some nasty coffee from the office coffee pot. I know that is certainly the case for me. If I cannot make my own, or afford some decent joe, I turn to other things to fulfill my caffeine needs.
